First of all, putting Tori Spelling on the cover of Star’s April 13th issue was a big mistake. Really, who cares about Tori Spelling? She’s a bad actress with a bad nose job. I bet Star didn’t do too well in sales that week.

However, being the addict that I am, I had to read the story about Tori’s mom’s “tell-all book”, and I must say, that is pretty low down and dirty. I don’t know why I think this, but I think it’s okay for kids to talk about their parents, but it’s not okay for parents to talk about their kids. I have no sympathy. I’m like, “You bore and raised the girl; if she’s a spoiled brat like you claim, it’s your fault!” DUH!

Also, the addict in me could not resist reading “Star Beauty: Getting Gorgeous with Molly”, even though I don’t care for the beauty sections of the tabloids. I’m such a sucker. The photo-article was about spending a day with Molly Sims who was getting primped for a fashion show where she wore a dress made with thousands of real dried cranberries. The dress was auctioned off at clothesoffourback.org. And I won! NOT!!!

What was really stupid about the article is it said that Molly “suffers from dry skin”, and that she uses Dial Antioxidant body wash with cranberries to moisturize in the shower. I’m sorry, but nobody “suffers” from dry skin. One might HAVE dry skin, but one does not suffer from it, unless one has psoriasis or eczema. And this Dial bodywash with cranberries which is probably scented would be the worst product for either of those conditions.

Now, on to the good stuff: US Weekly’s April 10th issue featuring Lindsay Lohan’s interview. Loved it! There’s just something about celebrity trainwrecks; I am so infatuated! I found the article quite hilarious. My impression of Lindsay? She’s a spoiled brat who goes around throwing temper tantrums and then crying because no one likes her. If all these people really turned on her like she says, it’s because of her own behavior. I also thought she sounded like a drama queen and I didn’t quite buy her story, like the parts about people hacking into her Twitter account and stalking her. In a way, I feel sorry for her because of her childhood and dysfunctional parents. But she has got to get it together. Get off the drugs, stop partying, get some mental help, and then try to salvage your career. Don’t worry about girlfriends or boyfriends. And Samantha Ronson? Please, you don’t need her ugly cokehead a**.